Kids Don't Give a Shit if You are From New York
But some adults do
Recently, I befriended an older gentleman with dementia. Norbert, my new friend, has trouble remembering names. However, he wrote down "Conor—Amerikaner" on a post-it, so now he never forgets my name anymore.
Being friends with Norbert has its perks. For example, I was reading in Heinrich's cafe when Norbert stormed in— smile shining through his medical mask. He gave me a fist pump, and turned to the pretty lady next to us,
"Did you know this young man speaks German very well, but he was not born here?" (in a German/English mix).
The Lady and I began chatting, but her entire demeanor changed as soon as she found out I was from New York. She shifted her body towards me and started smiling more. After about ten minutes, I stood up to beat the snow home. To which she said, "Oh no, the boy from New York is leaving." She had a thing for New York.
When I meet people abroad, they are usually impressed with my origin, although I had nothing to do with it— and Long Island is much different from the New York they often imagine. However, I had a second interaction with strangers on my way home that went entirely different.
Becoming Santa Claus
When I pulled around to our "Hof"— a type of backyard in Germany enclosed by apartment buildings, young kids were playing in the fresh snow. I felt playful too, so I howled, "Ho, Ho, I am Santa Clause" and hid behind a bush.
The Giggles and snowballs stopped at once. Slowly the children crept around the bush, and I surprised them with snowballs. Then I asked the young sister,
"Can you speak English?"
"No, but I speak Spanish" (in English)
When I found out that her parents were from Argentina and I said,
"Yo soy americano... too. I am from New York State"
To which she answered,
"Oh."
That was it. It meant literally nothing to her that I was from New York. No high status, no curiosity, just "Oh." So it seems some conditioning changes New York from a place to a status symbol from childhood to adulthood.
Why does this matter?
I do not believe humans are blank slates. Personality differences are often noticeable from a young age. For example, my brother was always good at math, and I was always good with people. However, I believe there is a lot of conditioning between childhood and adulthood.
It is worth questioning which conditionings do not serve us and are worth abandoning. For example, should we really treat New Yorkers with unearned preference? I don't see any reason to.
Merry Christmas
I wish you a Merry Christmas and I hope you have the chance to spend some time with children over the holidays. It is refreshing.
12/21 Update:
I don’t mean to categorize all excitement about New York as wrong. New York is a cultural capital of the world and that is exciting for many people.
The point is we shouldn’t be impressed with New Yorkers just because they are from there. (Even though I benefit from this dynamic.)