Stop Feeling Embarrassed
When I was in fourth grade, my classmates and teacher called me tomato face. Back then, I used to feel embarrassed a lot and constantly turned beet red. Nowadays, I am rarely embarrassed and hardly blush. It is a much better mode of operation. Anyone can make the same transformation.
In Scott Adam’s book Loserthink, he recommends we routinely enter situations where we may feel embarrassed for two reasons:
If we succeed in avoiding embarrassment, we will gain confidence.
If we feel embarrassed, it will quickly fade from the forefront of our minds and become a reminder that it’s not so bad. We may even walk away with a good story.
When I notice myself starting to feel uncomfortable socially, that has become a cue for me to move forward with caution instead of retreating. In building this habit, I felt my fair share of embarrassment, but gradually the effect has been reduced. For example, I used to fear going to cafes, so I started going to cafes for at least 30 minutes. Also, I often partake in job interviews and network with strangers on LinkedIn partially for this reason.
My parents also understood the value of this because when we were little, they had us kids call to order the pizza. At first, it felt funny, and I was embarrassed. But then, it became a regular thing for me, and I was primed for the following social challenges. We should be preparing children to function socially early. That is why I look children in the eyes and shake their hands when I meet them.
The more directly we approach embarrassment, the less power it has over us. Lastly, don’t forget embarrassment only exists within our heads. It is not the situation or people which make us feel embarrassed but our judgment of those things. Therefore, we all have the power not to feel embarrassed.
What would you do if you didn’t fear embarrassment?