These Three Things Make it Hard to Tell the Truth + how you can overcome them
Tell the Truth pt. II
Previously, we talked about the value of speaking the truth:
However, I'll admit it's not always easy to tell the truth. The truth can hurt our Ego, force us to recognize shortcomings, and result in uncomfortable social situations. In this post, we will examine some common barriers to the truth and how to overcome them.
Ego Barrier
Our Ego is one of the most substantial barriers to the truth. Take, for example, an alcoholic. The functioning alcoholic might deep down know they are suffering because of drinking, yet shrug it off and say, "It's not that big a deal, I am still getting good grades." or "I am still paying the bills." It is this failure to admit our shortcomings to ourselves that holds us back from the truth.
What are the consequences?
In the short term, the alcoholic benefits from ignoring the truth because he can maintain his lifestyle. The alternative, admitting his alcohol problem, will immediately disrupt his daily rhythms and social life. However, ignoring the truth is like putting a bandaid on a wound that needs stitches. Time, the ultimate judge of truth, will eventually break the damn.
What are the benefits of admitting the truth?
On the other hand, after admitting, "Yes, I have an alcohol problem," the alcoholic can confront reality and move forward towards healing. In fact, admission of the problem is the first step in alcoholics anonymous, a nearly hundred-year-old sobriety group with a high success rate.
How to Overcome this barrier
One easy way to start overcoming the barrier is to embrace direct and open feedback from your personal and professional relationships. By actively seeking out information about our shortcomings, we can leverage the knowledge to improve ourselves.
Ignorance and Assuming
Ignorance combined with the assumption of knowledge is a second barrier to the truth. If we were to go to class assuming we already knew what the teacher would teach us, how could we learn anything? So, the first step in learning is to admit we don’t know.
'I know that I know nothing" - Socrates
How to overcome this barrier
Don’t assume— be a willing student.
“When you assume you make an ASS out of U and ME” - my old math teacher
Cognitive Dissonance
In Robert Cialdini’s Influence, the author identifies “commitment and consistency” as foundational tendencies of humans. As such, we remain attached to our once-held beliefs long after what would be deemed objectively rational. Sometimes we are even willing to blatantly ignore facts just to keep our previously held worldview intact. Something similar happened to me when I stumbled across Ray Dalio’s “The Changing World Order” on LinkedIn last year.
For many Americans, myself included, phrases like “Changing world order” or “Aging Empire” imply an unfavorable outlook on the future. However, the data and narrative Dalio presented moved me from “America will remain the world’s superpower indefinitely." to “America is an aging empire being actively challenged by a rapidly rising China, who will likely catch up by most metrics in my lifetime.” Is this the truth? Only time will tell, but I would rather be prepared than blindsided.
How to overcome this barrier
Avoid ideological echo chambers— actively seek out opinions that differ from yours.
Be able to concisely and rationally explain your closely-held beliefs.
In Conclusion
The truth is a beautiful thing. The closer in line our worldview is with the truth, the more effective we can live. The long-term benefits greatly outway the short-term consequences of embracing the truth.
P.S. Your Comments
Ever since switching the blog to substack.com, comments are way down. I enjoy hearing your opinions, and you are welcome to comment!
I love the way you came back to an old blog and injected a new idea as well! It’s so important to figure out how you want to live when you’re younger. I don’t think enough young people are taught that skill. How do you want to live and how do you want to be perceived as a person? Those are really good questions! And telling the truth is a great way to become the person you would like to be.